Today's devotional brought me to Psalm 90. Verse 12 (NKJ version) says, "So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom" -- meaning, it is not how long we live that counts, but how we live.
We talk about wanting to live a long life, but it may be pointless if our life is meaningless. I'd like to live to be 100, but I sure don't want to be a vegetable ... i.e., an invalid hooked up to machines, bed ridden, no one to love, no one to love me. I suppose that is being selfish. I don't know. I'm sure God will let me know.
I was thinking of how much I ask from the Lord. More than perhaps I have any right to do. Yet, He is my Father, and my physical father was mostly absent from my life. To the Lord I can talk and discuss my life, my feelings. He knows me. ... way more than I know myself. I need to be able to let things out to somebody. He doesn't judge me - He will judge me, but not the way I mean right now. He does not have a preconceived thought that I'm up to no good, that I can't do this or that. The Lord never considers me worthless. He loves me. For that and much more I am most grateful.
Thank you Lord Jesus for being my Savior, my friend, my confidant, my mentor, my all.
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