I just do not understand, yet I am as guilty as the next person. God tells us to look to Him, dwell on Him, abide in Him, pray continually, and enjoy sweet sweet fellowship with Him. But do we? It often seems to be that way only when we are at a God event, a spirit-filled event, such as a Bible Camp or Bible Conference. We study His word, we get wrapped up in what He has to say to us and we feel so enriched, so uplifted, so fulfilled. We are filled to the brim with praise for our Savior.
And then we fall.
It's like we return to the real world. Not that we weren't in the real world, but inevitably, something comes along and our high comes out from under us and we have very nearly fallen off a cliff.
I suppose that is God's way of showing us how much more we have to learn and grow. Start all over again. Looking to our Savior, dwelling on Him, abiding in Him, praying to Him, listening to Him, obeying Him, following Him, praising Him.
If we only did this continually, we would near fear, we would never think we are so smart. We would never get so caught up in things that irritate us, stupid petty things. We would never let situations get the best of us. Our total being would be centered, focused on Jesus. And He would enable us to get past all of it. But we don't do that. We strive to. We want to. We try to. For a little bit maybe we achieve our goal. But I think, unfortunately, our mind set is not on the truth, not on what Jesus says to do, not on living totally for Him.
And that is so sad, so stupid, so dumb.
It's more than a mind thing, its a total heart thing. It's more than something that happened in your heart many years ago and then just sat there. It's a growing, needing, loving forever and ever the Savior who made us whole. Why don't we live as whole?
I really do not understand. Yet I want to. I want to be what Jesus desires me to be, always, every moment, every day. I want to be whole.
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