Scripture for Jesus' process for resolving conflict with another believer is found in Matthew 18:15-17:
"If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the fault. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If that person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. If the church decides you are right, but the other person won't accept it, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector."
Step 1 - confront the person by yourself
Step 2 - confront him or her with one or two other believers
Step 3 - bring the situation before the church
Step 4 - remove the person from church leadership/fellowship
I think sometimes we skip some of these steps. An individual may be afraid to confront another, even though they are a believer, so goes immediately to step 2. A group of believers, such as deacons, may decide its better not to bring the situation before the entire church, so skips step 3 and goes immediately to step 4.
I think it is very unfortunate when the church is not involved in the decision making. Except for a few, we have no idea why someone in our midst is ostracized and are often told, its of no concern. Doesn't this open up a whole new can of worms?
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